Soft Skills in Hard-Skill Jobs

Since I've been with my wife, I've gained insight into a world previously unknown to me. Before, I was preoccupied with skills and knowledge. But if I want to maintain a successful relationship, I need more skills. So-called soft skills. This is the reading between the lines of life.

At my wife's employer, a hospital, these skills are a given. Most employees can assess the feelings and conditions of others. They ask questions and try to accommodate them. More or less successfully.

At my employer, a software service provider, it's different. Soft skills are rare, and the world is one of hard skills, one of measurable performance, or so it seems. A nearly clichéd example occurred on my first day at work. A man came in who was on a committee for enforcing corporate values. He mentioned the four levels of Schulz von Thun. This model describes that we communicate on different levels: the factual level, the appeal side, the relationship side, or self-revelation. This values manager then said, "We communicate on the factual level in this company." This example is cute. He knew the levels but didn't understand that we have limited influence over which level we communicate on. I had to visibly smirk when he said that.

My hypothesis is that one can stand out from others through both soft skills and hard skills. With an understanding of communication, I can show more initiative and actively influence conversations and project progress. Especially when my counterpart is weaker on this level.

Moreover, I claim that hard skills also make a difference. If my wife's boss wants to please everyone, she can exploit that and push her concerns through. But she can also stand out from her colleagues through better performance.